Breathe it in nice and deep.

Aaaaaaaahhhhhhhh…

I think it’s skunk spray.  Maybe a little tomcat dander.

I have to be up in 4 hours for a 12 hour day, plus a total commute time of about 3 hours.  If I can power through, maybe I’ll get back onto a normal schedule.

I feel like all of this time is a complete waste… I’m up and feel like I should make use of it by getting some real writing done.  But if I go down that path, I’ll really wake up my brain and there will be no shutting it off.  But now I’m too much of a zombie during the day to get anything of substance done.

Like Fat-Bastard once said, “It’s a vicious circle.”

After a month and a half of June gloom in L.A., the sun came out this afternoon and it warmed up a bit. However, we also got a random sprinkling of rain for 10 minutes in the afternoon. It’s made the city more humid and smelly than strip club in Tampa during the summer.

I feel the funk of b.o. beginning to come out of my pores. If I take a shower, the tiny bit of sleepiness in my eyes will vaporize. So I’m going with the 7th grade p.e. class version of respectable personal hygiene to keep my sleep-buzz developing: an extra pass of deodorant and a squirt of body spray on the clothes to get me through 6th period algebra.

B.O. used to remind me of public school locker rooms. Now it’s a Sunday afternoon at the Glendale Galleria trying to get to the Apple store.

I had the biggest crush on Wonder Woman as a kid. I was inconsolable when an episode would end. I don’t think it was true love though… I was mostly just fascinated with her breasts. But stronger relationships have been built on less.

YouTube Link: 3-year-old crying over Justin Bieber
(Sadly, embedding is disabled)

I don’t know anything about this Justin Bieber kid except that he hit on Chelsea Handler when he was on her show. If I was 13 and sitting on a pile of money, I’d be hitting on everything that moved too.

What's that, lady? You're not interested? No worries... I've got a roll of nickels somewhere around here to keep me company.

But that was then, and this is now.

So, who am I?

Sometimes I am a freelancer in the film and TV world. Sometimes I am a temp. Sometimes I am a handyman. Sometimes I wake up after 9am, play video games all day and eat nothing but candy. You’ve not seen a renaissance man like this since Danny DeVito.

I like my coffee sugared and creamed to the discriminating taste of a five-year-old sugar fiend. I can’t do math in front of other people. I am terrible at spelling and grammar, but expect perfection from everyone else. I can be wordy and tend to overuse ellipses and html linking. I’m still trying to figure out life, love, and how to make the perfect pancake.

I’m not quite sure yet as to what you can expect to find here in the future. Mostly, I’m just hoping for this to keep me actively writing and creative and to be a healthy distraction from writing the next great-American screenplay (working title “Baby-Genuises 7: Back in tha’ Crib”).

So, let’s get started…